Running this Race & Being Content

Alright, I have so many journals and so many incredible experiences, and this is going to be my place to put some of my favorites, or most memorable thoughts, experiences and past journal entries.

This experience happened back in fall of 2011, my last cross country season I competed in at Utah State. It was at regionals in Provo, Utah, after a fun filled, healthy season. We'd been everywhere from Arkansas to Hawaii and probably my most memorable season at Utah State, not just because I was healthy but because of how much fun we had, and how dearly I loved my teammates. Did I mention how much fun we had?

But back to regionals in Provo, my family happened to all be there in Utah for my race, but during my race I kept hearing my name being cheered by people other than my family, there were so many spectators at this race that when I looked I couldn't always see who it was cheering my name. As the race came to an end and I crossed the finish line I  was greeted not only by my family, but by old friends and extended family that I didn't know had come to my race. It was such an awesome experience to have people cheering for me all along my race, encouraging me and pushing me along. But after this cross country race I had one of the most meaningful revelations or realizations, "ah-ha" moment, whatever you wish to call it.

This is the only picture I can find from Regionals right now. But I'll add more later. 

This experience related my cross country race to our mortal journeys here on earth. In a way, I believe that cross country race is similar to our mortal journeys here on earth. Our Heavenly Father sent us down to endure and enjoy this earthy life. There may be times in which our race is difficult, we may want to give up or get discouraged and slow the pace or even quit. But there are others who we cannot see who are cheering us on, encouraging us to keep going, to "run the race". It will not be until after we finish our earthly race that we will see all of those who were cheering for us during our earthly life. Maybe this isn't that amazing of a concept to those who may be reading this. But for me it was life-changing way to look at things. This experience was before I had been through my rappelling accident and paralyzed. But it means just as much now as it did then, if not more. 

What an amazing concept: there are family members, friends and loved ones that have passed on, as well as our Savior cheering us on in this life. And not until we finish our course and run this earthly race will we be able to see all of those who were cheering for us. I just think about how joyous it was at the finish line to be reunited with my family, friends and teammates; and that is just a small portion of who will be there and what we will feel after we've completed this earthly life.

Now another thought that I had a while back when relating running and racing to our mortal journeys was the effort we put into the race. For those who race or perform, one of the worst feelings is afterwards when you realize what you could have done better, moments you could have worked harder and regrets on how you raced or performed. 

Being content with those guns I was allotted,
as well as my swollen and broken legs. 

Again, I think once we've finished our earthly life we will look back over our race and think is there something I could have done better? Just as with racing, I want to give it my all and have no regrets and lay it all out on the line when it comes to living my life and enduring this earthly life. So I've committed to give this life my all, to lay it all out on the line to live a faithful life, to not miss scripture study and prayer, because when I finish I don't want to look back and regret a time during my race in which I wish I would've worked harder or been more faithful. Now I'm already part way through this earthly race, but there is always time to change and recommit and refocus. I want to return to my Heavenly Father and tell him although I couldn't run anymore I ran a good race, I did all that I could, I want to be exhausted at the finish line, knowing I did all that I could and gave it my all. 

One of my favorite quotes about endurance is from an apostle of Jesus Christ, Neil A. Maxwell,:

"ENDURANCE 

is not only the acceptance of thing allotted us, 

it is to act for ourselves by magnifying what is allotted to us."

And that is exactly how I wish to live my life, I'm not just accepting that I'm paralyzed and "enduring" it and getting through life. I want to magnify what the Lord has blessed me with, what he has allotted unto me, because He has given me so much. Many do not know all the conditions of my accident, but I was not wearing a helmet that night. And what a HUGE tender mercy it was that there was no brain damage or trauma; at least not that I know of ;) I believe part of the reason He has allotted me so much, is so I may testify of Him, and His strength and healing. 

My favorite scriptures early on during my accident were located in both the New Testament and the Book of Mormon. First is Alma, a prophet in ancient Americas and he writes:

"But behold, I am a man, and do sin in my wish, for I ought to be content with the things which the Lord hath allotted unto me"

Alma 29:3

Paul, an apostle of Jesus Christ, writes in the New Testament similar feelings:

"Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content."

Phillipians 4:11

This is a lesson that I was learning and working on before my accident, but it took on a whole new meaning during my time in the hospital. Often times I would get frustrated as I had sensation and feeling returning to my legs but because of all the broken bones in my lower limbs and feet I wasn't allowed to do simple tasks that I saw others around me doing. I was humbled by these scriptures which reminded me to be content with what the Lord allotted me. He had given me so much are spared my life and I ought to be content "with the things which the Lord hath allotted unto me". 

These scriptures can be applied to all of us though; we may not be content with where we are in life, we may want a different job, to be married, or to have children, to be finished with school, the list goes on and on. But the Lord wants us to be content and find joy where we are now in whatever state we are in. As a single or married, student or employee, whoever and wherever we are he wants us to be content. That doesn't mean He wants us to stay in that stage forever but do what you can with what you have, where you are. Don't wait until a future moment or time to be happy. Be content with were the Lord has placed you today.